Open for Biz!

dating myself.

I’m sicky today. Woke up with a sore throat and that kind of high as a kite feeling in my head. So I tried to stay home today. Man, it gets dark out so fast now that I feel like the entire day dissappeared and all I did was cut my bangs for about an hour and then go the the hairdresser to fix my bangs. I feel crappy crap.

Actually, I just feel really weird. Like I’m sort of losing my mind a bit. Like I’ve got so much going on the inside my head is just chaos. It’s messy inside and I don’t like it. I think it’s the reason why I’ve started to sess out a relationship and to be honest. Like, there is so much coming up for me (in reality and emotionally) that I’m looking for a distraction, and what better distraction then finding and hooking into a new crush!

But this isn’t the answer and to be honest, I don’t think I’m ready for all this. I’m not feeling good about this ‘on the prowl’ stuff at all. I just want to go about my life and let things happen. I guess I’m just feeling that this isn’t sitting right with me. All this online dating stuff. I totally know that it works, I really do, I’ve hear about 50 stories – ok, maybe like 30 of people who it’s worked for, but I guess I’m not wanting this like I thought I did. I think I’m using it for the wrong reasons, rather then being myself and doing what I do and having this unfold perfectly as it should be planned to be by my good friend, The Universe.

I don’t know. I think the reason I feel so quick to jump in and out of things is that for the past few months, with the opening up of the new shop, I’ve not really had my life. The past day or so I’ve noticed just how much of what I used to love doing, I don’t do anymore. And I’m not upset or depressy about it – au contrare, I’m actually excited and inspired about it. I’ve realized that I haven’t had the time, or made the time for me as of late and all this longing for some romance is just a longing for some attention from myself. The practical application of Dating Myself got lost somehow, and that’s fine – I have trouble with balance, I get that, whatever. But I just need to get back to myself. Respond to my own profile and ask myself out. See what I want to do, what would make me feel happy, special, loved and appreciated and then do it for me. Fill me up so I’m not looking for it elsewhere and also so I’m overflowing and better able to give to others from here.

I know that I will find love, I mean really, come on, everyone can, but I know I won’t find it from this place. I’m not going to attract someone who will be sweet and loving to me when for the past few months I haven’t been all that sweet or loving to me. I mean really, if I were to pretend that myself was a small child and I was taking care of me – I would have been taken away by child and family services for sure. Somedays I didn’t even give myself a cup of noodles till like 7:30 at night. I fed my cat more then I did myself. But again, balance is hard especially when starting up a biz so I’m not going to gang up on myself, I think I did pretty well, but it’s an opportunity to notice that ‘me time’, friendships, family, health/fitness, creativity and play time got a little pushed to the wayside for a bit and now it’s time to bring it back in! Starting with homemade soups for my sick little throat and a double feature from my cozy ‘jesus’s cloud’ pillow top mattress.

Being sick I swear is like the greatest thing for me. I know the Universe does it on purpose. Let’s me reel out of control, get a lot done and then says ‘hey sugar tits, time to cool your jets, get things in check and since I know you won’t do that on your own, I’m gong to force you to be good to yourself, so you remember how important it is.’

As the great and freaky faced Mick Jagger sings, “you can’t always get what you want, But if you try sometimes well you just might find, You get what you need
Oh baby, yeah, yeah”

Dexter and a great email!

sweet god. I just watched the season finale of Dexter. It just blew my mind with it’s shocker of an ending. I feel like I need a hug. I’m confused and disoriented and just plain shocked. I’m not sure how I feel right now. If you haven’t seen it, watch each episode, they are amazing. First tv show I’ve ever tuned in fo (or PVR’ed) to watch every episode.

shocked.

But not as shocked as some of the messages I’ve gotten from plenty of fish. Yes, since I’m on the online dating band wagon I thought I’d sign up for that one too. To be honest, I was ok with eHarmony. To me it seemed kind of nice. A bit of a sophisticated way to do things. Dr. Warren (the old man in the commercials) sends you messages and guides you through your “communications” with your matches. You only get about 7 matches per day – I’m guessing to prolong your membership – but at the same time, it’s ok, you check your matches in the am and then your done for the day! Easy and yes, a bit fun! But Plenty of Fish just feels a little dirty. Don’t get me wrong, I’m for sure going to give it a try as I’ve heard of tons of people who’ve found love (and normal people) on it – but I gotta say, I’m getting some wierdo’s. Case in point – here is word for word, message I just received:

“If there is one thing you can teach to passing strangers in the short moments afforded to us in time what would it be?
If i say … that in order to be positive and appreciat life you must first know negative and suffer … to differentiate, just like if love lost hurts so much… it must have been beautyfull to be missed so… no?
lol
Hi … out of nowhere huh? ya… Michael here just poken around.
Do you by chance like to debate or converse about … just about anything so long as its a involved conversation, no i dont mean
sexchat.
Well if you wanna jazz some time let me know.
Peace out Sis.
Michael”

His pic – A shot of his cat.

Yeah, yeah it’s kind of funny, I must admit, but I don’t think  it was his intention was for it to be funny. and that’s the difference really.

eHarmonied.

Well, after a much deserved tough lashing from a reader who posted a comment on my last post – I gave in and eHarmonied myself. Said fuck it, lady reader, you are right, this attitute about love is getting me no where so let’s start putting it out there and pull in some Notebook style love!

So, yes I did it. I took the plunge of internet match making after hearing three success stories of internet romance just this week alone – 2 just today! Well, let’s just say after me and my friend Heather spent about 2.5 hours answering the profile questionnaire, another 20 mins scouring my iPhoto’s for some ‘good but full of personality pics’ and spent about $130 bucks for a three month subscription – and I eagerly anticipating my matches.

Now, let me first start off by saying that I didn’t limit myself to a 50 mile radius. I actually clicked that fellows in Europe and the US were fine too – I mean really, you wouldn’t love a foreign romance. New Jersey here I come! So you can imagine my surprise when I only got back 7 matches. Yeah, that’s right 7. Not 7 one one page, 7 TOTAL. One of which I swear to god was one of the now grown up kids in the Trench Coat Maffia from the hit film, ‘Blowing for Columbine’. No joke, about three of his pics were of him in a large sombrero type khaki hat and a floor length trench coat.

So anyway, despritebeing dumbfounded as to how me and Sawed Off we were a match, and also as to how in the entire continents of both North America AND Europe I manged to only have 7 matches – I’m feeling good. Feeling like perhaps it’s like finding an apartment to rent – that even though you will most likely find your perfect place through a friend of a friend of a friend, it still helps to get the energy moving by searching a few posts on Craigslist!  So perhaps I won’t find my somebody via the internet but the energy is now out there Universe. Send me Ryan Gossling if you can. Loved him in Breaker High.

confessions of a shopaholic, an existential crisis & forgiveness.

I just finished watching Confessions of a Shopaholic. It was on tv and I was putting up my Christmas tree (yes that line was in there to let you know that I did NOT rent this film) but I will say it was enjoyable none the less. All these chick flicks are I guess – they are not great movies, terrible writing but they hold the interest for me well enough. The lame jokes and crazzzzy antics the girls get themselves into I can do without – why do the leading ladies always have to be so clutsy anyway – like really, I don’t know one girl that has ever quickly turned around, bumped into a waiter causing his oversize tray to go flying and then he crashes onto a table with really psh people sitting at it – but I’ve seen it on screen maybe 1 trillion times. Barf – like why the slap stick humour hollywood?!  I don’t get it…. regardless, my point is that I love the romance bits in these cheesy ass “Romedy’s” (that’s romance and comedy together – I might have just made that up – please someone quote it as mine in Wikipedia please). I just eat that shit up. I do. I love watching the initial sparks of when they first meet, knowing that they are going to fall for each other. I love watching things progress – the first date, the first kiss. It’s all so much fun. I even love it when they have a big fight and there is a time elapse montage and it just seems like they are never going to get back together until, one day, they bumb into one another and then – game on again. They make up and its utterly fantastic again!!!

But tonight, as I watched the final scene, and they make up with nothing but a few quips and a kiss – and it’s all magical and amazing. I actually felt really sad. Not sad in the normal way I would when seeing a scene like this – which is more ‘excited longing’ like the, ‘oh maaaaaaannnnn, I wish I had a guy to be in love with and that we would have a big fight and he would come find me on the street, bring me a scarf he bought at an auction that has significant sentimental value to me and then we will kiss and be in love forever’ kind of way.  But in the way of, ‘wow. that doesn’t really exist. This feeling that I have watching this – I will only get from watching a moive – I’ll never really have this in real life.’ Whatever chemical emotions get triggered by watching romantic movies, reading romantic books – it doesn’t happen in real life.

I guess I should know this already – being that I’m close to 30 – I think you are supposed to realize that movies aren’t real when you’re like 7 or something – but I guess I just never thought it applied to love movies – I just thought it was action/adventure films that had all the beefed up drama and that love could be like it is in the movies.

I don’t know anymore. I really think that I’m completely jadded now. I get the impact of losing your innocence. Of having life happen and how it hinders your outlook. Breakups. Cheating. Legal battles. This is how I think of all relationships now and I am TERRIFIED of them. I don’t even want a boyfriend to move in with me for fear of him getting common law status – forget having a child with someone else – as if I want a) custody drama and b) to be tied to someone for the rest of my life through our child. Sounds crazy, I know – I don’t want to believe what I’m saying , but the sad thing is I do. I don’t know. I’m clearly really upset about all this (thanks confessions of a shopaholic).

I just don’t believe in love anymore – at least not the movie kind. Love to me means cheating and endings and extreme amounts of pain and anger. I don’t want to feel this way about it. I really don’t but it’s hard not too when that’s what I know now. That’s what I’ve seen all over my life. In my parents, in my former relationship – shit even in friendships that have gone sour. It’s completely maddening, well saddening really. I just feel like people are capable of anything and everything – it all depends on what they want to believe. If love and creating a life with someone can go so horrifically bad, then so can the rest of it. Maybe it’s not love then. Love by definition isn’t all of those things – it’s supposed to be the greatest thing on earth. But by saying that then it must not be present. Or at least if it was, it’s fleeting and gone, turned to hate in an instant.

I heard love and hate described one time as being on this broken circle. Like if you took your index finger and your thumb and you made the OK sign with them but didn’t let them touch – Love would be the tip of your index finger and hate is the tip of your thumb. If you traced along your finger down your hand all the way back up to the tip of your thumb – love really is the furthest thing away from hate – but if you made the little sliver of a jump between the tip of your finger to the tip of your thumb – all of a sudden love and hate are so close it’s scary. And it’s true. When you are in love – hate seems like the furthest thing possible from where you are. You would do anything for that person – and then this jump gets made – something happens and that leap from love over to hate happens. This person, whom you once had so much love for that it was overwhelming, has turned into someone that you have overwhelming hate for.  It’s so bizarre and I just don’t want it. I don’t want the pure potentiality of loving someone again and there to be that potential for me to hate them.

To be honest, I’d love to pretend that I don’t hate anyone becuase it doesn’t seem nice to hate people. But fact is, I do. I really hate some people sometimes. Often I don’t forever – sometimes we make up or it turns to indifference or just too much time has passed and even if the hate is still there the fury of it has died down (yes, I still hate Cheryl Krat and Aimee Lucie for terrorizing me in grade 7, I just don’t have vengeance plans for them anymore) and maybe it’s not the perosn I hate, but their behaviour – what they do or who they are being or what they say, but let’s be honest, it’s sort of symonomous with them, right?! Hate the sinner not the sin. Can that even be distinguished?! I guess so. There are things that I could be hated for, and most likely am. But that’s where it gets complicated. Because that’s exactly it. Not too many people do things out of pure evil. No one hurts someone else because they are evil and doing it intentionally to harm the other person, that’s in fact the point – they weren’t even thinking of the other person. It was only what mattered to them that made their choice seems awful, because it’s what they wanted/needed/had to do at the cost of someone else. Those grade 8 bitches, Cheryl and Aimee – maybe there low self esteems made them have to take it out on someone else. And does that make them wrong or evil or is that just human? In pretty much every situation I can see how someone got to where they did. Even in people that I hate or strongly disagree with there behavior or actions.. I see why they did the thing that they did and I understand it. I see both sides.  Who’s to say I would do the same thing if I were them, living their lives, going through what they go through, only having the resourses (mental, emotional, or otherwise) that they do. Chances are I would. But of course, I still hate the person. I still make them wrong, I still judge them, because well, sometimes it just feels better to seethe with anger and resentment then it does to forgive and accept. That shit’s tough. But really, maybe that’s how you soften up and get the point of life. Get that yes, people make mistakes. we are all human. Maybe that is love. Ew, love better be more that…. ok, maybe just a part of love.

Speaking of which, I as I was writing this, a friend emailed me with a job description and asked if I knew anyone that might be good for a position that just opened up at his company. This girl that I hate could be perfect for it.

I’m proud to say, I forwarded it along to her! Forgiveness. Pass it on.

Dick Pic’s

Ok. So tonight I was reading this blog that I’ve read a few times before – not even sure how I found it – it’s a girl that writes about her life- same kind of thing as me – anyway, she tells this tale of this guy she met on facebook and they struck up a text/email/phone ‘relationship’ and how it was going well until one night – he sends her a ‘Dick Pic’ – like he even used that terminology like it’s a common thing – and just reading that has a) blown my mind that this is common practice now – that guys send dick pics and how utterly ridiculous is that and b) it makes me feel soooo much better because – let me tell you, a little while back – I got a Dick Pic sent to me.

Yes.

I had a dick pic sent to me via blackberry messenger – AFTER I said to the guy, um, fuck no, I don’t want to see a picture of your wiener. He sent it anyway – like who the fuck does that – it’s soooooo creepy!!!! I was actually offended that he would even ask if I wanted to see it in the first place. Then disturbed that he still sent it after I said no. Then just totally turned off when I viewed it. Yes, yes of course I looked at – I mean, how do you not look when someone sends you something like that. And let me just say – it was totally misshapen. Like, who sends a photo of their pee pee when it’s all deformed anyway. I at first felt kind of sorry for him – thought perhaps he was so self conscious of his mal-formed wanky wank and therefore before starting something up he needed to get it out of the way – let me know before I’d find out later perhaps – but noooooow, I see that it must just be a thing that people do in this crazy high tech world.

So rank. Can you imagine if ladies started sending Vitamin P pics – sooooo gross. eeewwwwww.

Brazilly Models Needed!

Ok, so at the 10 spot we do an extensive training on all our services. All of our gals are fully accredited from their Esthetics programs and have experience in the field, however, once hired at our shops, we do a full 10 Spot training program so that they are up to par with our standards and so that all of our services are executed with the same impeccable savvy style. So it goes without saying that our Brazilian training is also pretty damn extensive. Seeing as that is what we are most known for – our Hot Box wax – we take extra care to ensure each and every Brazilly is done perfectly.

Here is the training program for Brazilly’s:

1. Asses skill level (b/c they’ve all been trained in school)
2. Bikini Brief and Bikini G training & testing
3. On the floor for those services
4. Brazilian demo with Brazilly Model and our Lead Trainer, Dawn Dermo (aka Brazilian queen – does ‘em in 7 minutes – books in like 8 in a row each day – I swear this girl must see more muffin then my Ex boyfriend…)
5. Esthetican takes home a waxing stick to practices our ‘twirl technique’ used with our hard wax and also practices our ‘S movement’ application
6. Demo / Practical #1 (with a Brazilly Model) – training is done with Dawn doing one side, and trainee doing the other.
7. Practice on own time (friends, co-workers, etc.)
8. Demo / Practical #2 (with a Brazilly Model) – Dawn supervises while trainee does service
9. More practice
10. Practical Test – Esthetican on her own with an ‘Experienced Brazilian Model (ie: we have a stock of people that know how they are supposed to be done at the 10 spot) and they report back to us and then it’s decided is our new hire is ready to be on  the floor or if they need more training to be absolutely perfect!
(And that’s just for one of our services – forget about our Facial Bar training – that includes a two day intensive product knowledge training at the Dermalogical Dermal Institute, BEFORE we even start on them!)

So, now, with so many new hires we have gone through our usual stock of models for steps 4, 6 and 8 and thus this is a shout out – for anyone who wants to get a FREE 10 Spot Brazilly by being a model for us. Please email my Leslieville Manger, Lisa for more info and to set up training. lisa@the10spot.com

she’s open – THE 10 SPOT LESLIEVILLE!!!

Sweet shit, it’s finally open!

It all came together and the Grand Opening Soiree was a totally blast and I just can’t even belive its up and running  we even did pretty well yesterday, I was happy for a first day!

Here are some pics of the space and of the par-tay!

Anyway, I’m feeling a little weird inside – a mixed bag of emotions and fatigue I guess. Not sure what to make of everything. I’m super excited, of course – so happy to have another baby business in my nest, but it hasn’t fully hit me yet, I don’t think. It’s so bizarre to think that something got created out of nothing. My whole life completely altered out of one conversation with my friend Craiggy three years ago over some pie. A silly thought that I wanted to have a little shop on Queen Street three years later turned into 2 locations (both on Queen Street), over 30 employees and a head office to call my very own!

I’m also still a little stressed out, on edge about a few things still – um, like if we can make money to pay for everything. But my amazing bookkeeper Laura has set out of goals and I think they are doable! I’m also feeling a bit proud of myself, which is nice.  This was a huge ass project and one that I ended up doing alone after the partner thing didn’t end up happening. I’m also happy that it’s all done – at least the stressful lanuch part with the insane deadlines and I’m relived that it all worked out and we opened before the holidays! I’m grateful too – grateful for all of the people that made this happen with me – the construction guys that really did do such a great job for me. My friends that helped out, my dad that flew in from Winnipeg and my mom that did the same, not once but twice and was there for all the grunt work – the countless trips around the city to buy everything in that new shop. Amazing to such such people in my life.

But, I’m also a little nervous about how I’m going to cope with all of it being done. I’m neverous that I won’t know what to do with myself. I’m not someone that relaxes easily and after the most intense four months of my life – a period of time where I took about 4 days off total in that period – I’m a little scared that I’ll have a meltdown because all the adrenaline that kept me going doesn’t have an outlet anymore. Like the thought of cooking a meal for myself today instead of eating Timmy Ho’s or RedRocket Cafe (which is in front of our new location and where I eat everyday) is a little overwhelming. Like I can open up a new biz but the thought of hitting up loblaws and getting out my pots and pans is intimidating – almost like it’s an over indulgence to take so much time out to be nice to myself and feed myself. I just haven’t had the luxery of time as of late and now that I’ve got some, I’m at a loss as to what I can/should/want to do with it. Even this am, I was up at 8:30 updating the website and getting ready for our new Online Gift Certificate feature! It’s like I can’t stop. I might just lose it if I slow down, but the back side of that is that if I don’t I really might just lose it – this pace is unhealthy. So today I am going to try my hardest to do a few “me things” I think I’ll make myself dinner and right now I’ll take myself out on a breakfast date. Just me and my journal and some hot coffee in this cold weather. Then I’ll sneek into the office!

2 more sleeps

2 more sleeps to go mo fo’s!!! then it’s party time, excellent and I can sleep in on Friday and perhaps get a little bit of a life back or at least start washing my hair at regular intervals again. Thank Jesus for hats!

some progress pics!